Saturday, September 08, 2007

Game 2: Nebraska 20, Wake Forest 17 (Tribute to Billy C's Old Boss: Just Win, Baby)

What we really learned from this game:
  • Groves Stadium (where the Demon Deacon's call home) seats a whopping 31,500. It's the smallest venue the Corn has played in since 1971 (the smart money was on a scrimmage I.M. Hipp threw in Billy Barty's back yard in the late 70's, thank God we didn't pick that in the Executive Game).
  • "Everyone in Nebraska is related to a Ruud, has a cousin named Gilbert Arenas, or is somehow related to Ahman Green." This according to our play-by-play man Dave Pasch. I don't get it either, but he sure as shit said it, I even had to rewind during the commercial for Jodie Foster's new movie to make sure I got the quote right.
  • Dave Pasch has one really, REALLY big nose. It's so big they only showed him once during the telecast, and I'm sure Kate Hudson will look to date Pasch soon.
  • The best way to describe Pasch's nose is from Richie Aprile, talking about Chirstopher Moltisanti: "Did you ever notice he's the only motherfucker who can smoke a cigarette in the rain with his hands tied behind his back? That nose is like a natural canopy."
  • The ABC/ESPN games now feature some player from each team to introduce the offense and defense. I'm just going to float this idea out here right now as a way to boost interest: Can we just get Al Cowlings to introduce everybody on both sides of the ball, for both teams next week? I'm sure nobody will be offended by this. I don't even think the Goldman or Brown families have a grudge against AC. You never shoot (or cut up) the messenger. An Al Cowings TV appearance will create a huge buzz, since the likes of an Appalachian State upset happening every week appears unlikely.
  • Lloyd Carr is still knee deep in gin.
  • Since insurance won't pay for these type of things, Billy C celebrated coming into some money but buying the same glasses Stallone used to wear to look smarter...
  • ...but he for whatever reason took them off when it was time for Erin Andrews to interview him at the end of the first half. In fact, I think Callahan missed Sam Keller's great 25 yard touchdown pass to give the Corn the lead right before halftime because he was so busy trying to find Andrews. I'm sure Billy C got very worried when he heard that Andrews was interviewing somebody from the Wake Forest basketball staff in the first half.
  • Song Callahan listens to in his headset right before kick-off: "Sex as a Weapon" by Pat Benatar. His song selection when it's 4th and short with less than than two minutes to play and it's so painfully obvious you should punt the ball away to pin the opponent back and put a lid on a road win: "It Don't Matter To Me", sung by David Gates and Bread. The song is like audio xanax for Billy C. Who knew? My cousin Gilbert Arenas gave me the inside scoop on this.
  • I'd like to hear a story about how Callahan went over to Kevin Cosgrove before going for it on that 4th and short and said, "Let's see that big playbook coming out of your pants stop this offense now fuckface!"
  • I thought Callahan was such the history buff. Did he learn nothing from the Cotton Bowl, when he pulled the same shit against Auburn? It worked out OK here, of course, but had Wake Forest even come back and tied the game, Billy C would have been putting his home for sale.
  • Here's something fun to look forward to when you have Andre Ware is your color guy for a game. He has an Andre "Hard" Ware segment to go with an Andre "Soft" Ware segment. The good folks at Spyware evidently passed on a sponsorship opportunity.
  • A good sign: Marlon Lucky gets better as the game goes on, something we really haven't seen since our cousin/uncle Ahman Green ran for the Huskers. Lucky keeps this up, there's a good chance the Corn will have a decent bowl game that Pat Summerall won't have to announce.
  • Another little thing the gambling community might want to know about before kick-off: We had the Big 12 officiating crew at this game, and a few questionable calls went the Huskers way. Not that it would have mattered, but still, it would have been nice to know.
  • Terrence Nunn actually becomes a receiver on the road. Six catches, 83 yards. He even caught all the balls that were right on the money.
  • I like this Sam Keller. A lot. He's got a charismatic cockiness about him we haven't seen around these parts in ages. You know, the kind of thing Eric Crouch didn't have.
  • Something we're just going to have to get used to during every Husker game that's televised this season: A segment on the Arizona State-to-Nebraska history of Sam Keller. Trust me, next week, Brent Musburger is going to act like he's the first person to ever tell the colorful story of Keller before the end of the first quarter against USC.
  • Every road game televised will also feature at least five shots of some Husker fans wearing a Corn Cob head with an announcer saying, "Nebraska fans travel about as well as any in the country." Hell, this week, they found some clown amongst the 31,000 with an AUTOGRAPHED Corn Cob hat. Which means somebody doesn't wash their Corn Cob hat, which is just wrong.
  • Nebraska is now 2-0 after getting a good road test. If the Billy C era has taught us anything (and yes, it's now officially defined as an "era"), it's that Husker fans should be happy with any win.
  • Andre Kitchen Ware couldn't answer the AFLAC Trivia Question (Who Was the Only Nebraska Player to win the Butkus Award?), but he did drop Turner Gill and Mike Rozier References.
  • The answer to the AFLAC trivia question is one Trev Alberts. You know, Ahman's Green older brother.
  • Oh yeah, the Huskers have some big game at home next week. And much to the delight of the Nebraska football coach who signed a big contract extension this week, I have no idea what to expect. He's a completely different coach on the road. The real thinking here is that since USC had an open date this week, Billy C and the boys didn't want to show them too much as they prepare to hit Lincoln.
  • This was the ultimate "trap" game. Even if it was in a stadium more suited for a Division III game, the Huskers get to fly home with the peace of mind that comes with being 2-0. As Ron Jeremy would say on the set of an 80's porn flick, Bring on the Trojans!


statefairband said...

Joe Dailey Syndrome (JDS):

In high pressure situations the quarterback's brain locks into neutral gear, accompanied by a loud cartoonish "boing" and a sense of sure impending doom. Symptoms include waving a football in the air at arm's length and shuffling around in place even though three defenders are close enough to enable you to detect what they had for breakfast. Usually results in turnovers.

Keller may have an impressive presence on the field, but so far has given us a few too many JDS moments for my comfort. I'm not saying he's the worst we've had but am a little puzzled at all the hype.

However, since Andre Tupper Ware assures me his miscues are all due to his year off (Ware apparently believes this year was spent cataloging butterflies in the Amazon), I'll adopt a wait and see attitude.

A precious moment from the game was Andre NordicWare claiming that a Keller interception was caused by pressure on the QB. This was followed by an instant replay showing that the pocket didn't even start to collapse until the ball left Keller's hand.

Is Ware always this bad, or was he just off today?

statefairband said...

I was probably too hard on Ware. He did a decent job on analyzing formations and avenues of attack.

I just got a bit cranky from his claims that every poorly thrown pass in the game was from pressure on the quarterback or too much time off or the price of bananas in Ecuador.

Andre, sometimes the QB just throws a crappy pass.

Dirtylaundry said...

The following blog (from a game where Frank Solich was involved ironically enough) argues that Andre Ware is the worst announcer ever. Today might have been as good as he gets:

TravisRoastBeef said...

Someone send Steve wynn the link to the post where I picked Michigan, after that MF'er I may get an all expense paid trip to wynn las vegas, hookers and drinks included, maybe a copter ride over the grand canyon. Unfortunatly for me my son had a fooseball game in Auburn and I had to listen to jim Rose paint this picture for me, he got Ruud and Mckeon messed up about 5 times in the first 1/4 , he might as well say the black linebacker or one of the white linebackers. For some reason after a big play he has to say DOCTOR!~!!!! At first I was pissed about the way the skers played...untill I heard this crap from callahan...(Not Verbatum) .."Were just happy, to come out of here with a win" This is a good football club" They got a lot of good athletes" We played our hearts out today" blah blah blah. On a side note, I am thinking of officially changing my last name to either, Ruud, Shanle, or Uhlir, for some reason these white MF'ers from Nebraska get spoon-fed anything they want no matter how bad they suck ass.

Minus Florida and LSU, College football has the parity it has craved like mangino for chocolate pancakes for years.

todd said...

Very good all round analysis. Much better than those rubes over on Huskerpedia.

This morning while watching the game I realized that I really miss the Husker squads from the days of yore when the games were all but decided as soon as they stepped on the field.

I really hope the current edition can make the leap, cause it just isn't any fun feeling a Wake Forrest induced ulcer set in before 10am.

TravisRoastBeef said...

watching LSU and VT, and I think I just saw Frank Beamers jaw drop,,,literally ...Bo Pelini may be the next coach at Michigan if he keeps this up.

TravisRoastBeef said...

Either I dont have a life, I am a dirty laundry junkie, its 10:30 on a sat. but I just heard Musberger tell Lisa Walters to ice down a beer for him in the parking lot at LSU for after the game..........has this little bitch not learned a thing? Open containers in public is the biggest thing wrong with this country today,,This guy just cant be on public streets without some form of alcohol in his hand, somebody photochop mussberger in a dirty santa outfit.

Dirtylaundry said...

Excellent point Trav: What irony would it be if Lloyd Carr, who's this year's Frank Solich, is replaced by white-hot assistant Bo Pellini, the guy who we all thought SHOULD have replaced Solich in the first place.

All said, why do I like this Husker team better than last year's already? The line blocks with more intensity, I feel with Keller the team's never out of it, Lucky's finally come into his own, and not even Callahan's mistakes are biting him. Yet.

Mac G said...

Who is related to Arenas on the the Husker team again? I thought Ware was totally against Nebraska. The Oline looked like crap and if Wake had their starting QB, they might have won easily.

Do Turner or Ruud actually make any plays? I rarely heard their names. I think Asante might still be a really good player but Juco Ball is over buddy. He had horrible tackling angles, especially on the long runs. I liked going for it late and all we needed was 2 yards to ice the game but I hated the play call. They were stacked in the box all game, play action or a roll out would have faired better.

You are dead on about Keller and Lucky. Keller is only going to get better once his timing improves with the WRs. Suh is the freaking man!

I have no idea what to expect against USC at all.

Dirtylaundry said...

I'm totally staying away from the USC/NU game. I've been predicting USC blowing the Corn out of the stadium for over a year now. Even after Saturday's squeaker, I have no clue what to expect. I'll have more later this week, but since it's probably the most anticpated home game in recent memory, perhaps the Corn can keep it relatively close.