Sunday, January 21, 2007

Outlandos d'Eh

OK since this has suddenly turned into a rock and roll blog, I've got a question: Why is it everyone I know and their brother is excited about the idea of a Police Reunion? Sting hasn't built a time machine that will suddenly transport us all to 1984, has he? I mean the guy's been making music better suited for dental office waiting rooms than jammin' out to for the last 15 years. (Who has a dream about blue turtles anyway? Acid heads, that's who.) Don't get me wrong, I thought the Police were cooler than cool in their day, I can recall as a teenager going into the mall record store and asking if they had a copy of Zenyatta Mondatta feeling like a true hepster. But come on, seeing these guys, who I assume still sorta hate each other, come back together for a mega cash grab constitutes the big buzz event for 2007? Really?

Well, if I go to the concert, I'm definitely not buying a t-shirt. That'll show em.

Which brings up another question to anyone over the age of 30 -- which I'd assume one would have to be to have any genuine interest in these old bastards gettin' on a stage and playing a half-hearted version of, "Canary in a Coalmine" -- just how does one comport oneself at a concert these days? Do you just sit there like you're watching a movie? Do you stand with your hands in your pockets, head slightly bobbing? Do you do some stationary dance in your allotted 3x3 foot personal space. The last concert I was dragged to (U2 -- another group I wouldn't mind seein' retire to the old rockers home...seriously, Bono, you're not Mother Theresa, so stop acting like it!) the whole question of how to behave had me so nervous I hit the vodka hard pre-concert and made a drunken ass out of myself beltin' along to "Beautiful Day."

Well, that's all for me folks, I can't believe that douchebag Rex Grossman is going to the Super Bowl, but that's not what this blog is about...


Dirtylaundry said...

I'm not at all excited about a Polic reunion, primarily because if they were going to reunite, it should have happened around 10 years ago. Like Van Halen almost did with Roth, and now THEY'RE talking about hitting the road, although with Eddie's KID on bass.

The only reason anyone does it is for the huge bucks. Think of one band that got back together and actually put out some decent new material. NOT ONE. As Ringo Starr once famously said, the best thing about Lennon dying is that there could be no reunion and their legacy would remain intact.

But of course, today I was on ticketmaster debating whether or not to plop down the visa for a pair of Bob Seger tickets when he comes to Omaha.

BSmokedTurkey said...

A gag order should be imposed on Sting before he totally defiles whatever cool factor the Police have left. I read a quote from him talking about how easy it was to make a pop hit. He just didn't do it because it wasn't challenging. Barf.

I think solving your concert dilemma with alcohol was the right move. Hands in the pockets/nodding along to the beat was the only good fallback.

notorious DEK said...

acid heads have dreams about blue turtles??

if that's the case, sign me up... has anyone in america done acid since 1998?

BSmokedTurkey said...

Not sure anyone will see this comment, but my theory is that the Police were really just one of the very few great "Eighties" bands. That's why people love them so much. How many great bands/artist can you think of that are linked to the Eighties? You have U2 and REM and some others but really, compared to any other decade in the rock era, the Eighties sucked ass.