Game 1: Nebraska 52, Nevada 10

(EDITOR'S NOTE: One of our contributors has been referring to this site as "the shit site", so we're more inspired than usual.)

I can't imagine how many times Pat Summerall was sitting at home, staring at his wife during the game and said, "He'd rather be Lucky than Good" about Marlon Lucky. I'm sure Summerall's wife wished he'd start drinking again. I'm sure Pat himself feels the same way. But screw him, he got his liver transplant, my dad didn't. And my dad would have never repeated the line "Better to be Lucky than good" every time Marlon Lucky touched the ball. Either way, big day for Marlon Lucky. I'm a fan of anyone who wears the #5, and I knew there was magic when Lucky chose to change from #20 (which should be retired by the way) to #5. I'm expecting big things from Lucky, as finally it looks like Billy C has confidence in one running back.

No need to look at any stats, but the thinking here is that Sam Keller's going to be a really fucking good quarterback. I can't even count how many bread basket balls that were dropped. Plus, as Dan Fouts pointed out, this is the first Husker QB who commands a huddle since Tommie Frazier. Now if he'd just lose that damn visor. I'm sure nobody's going to be happier to see Maurice Purify next week than Keller, because Terrence Nunn just can't get away from the fact that he's Terrence Nunn.

So what's there to bitch about really? OK, I really wanted to hang 60 on Nevada, something Billy C has yet to do and TO would do routinely in these early non-conference games. No big deal, I'm just pointing it out.

Dan Fouts also wants everyone to know there has yet to be a kick-off return for a touchdown in the Callahan era at NU. Fouts would also like to spoon tonight with Husker kicker Alex Henery, who ironically enough is wearing #20. Which means it's time for the annual rant. Retire #'s 7, 20, and 30 immediately for the three Heisman winners. Throw in Frazier's 15 if you want. You STILL have enough jerseys around for everyone to have their own number. But Johnny Rodgers old number is being worn by a kicker? Granted, it's worn by a kicker Dan Fouts would like to make sweet love to, but still. Just be sure if you're in downtown Lincoln tonight and some old bearded guy asks you where Alex Henery lives, you just run and hide.

I knew it would be fun from the opening moments, when Billy C tried to jump up and touch the sign during the tunnel walk. He looked like George Costanza trying to prove he could jump higher in those new shoes he wanted to impress Jimmy with.

The ESPN -- oops, ABC crew, had Tom Osborne introduce the Husker offense and defense. Meanwhile, Nevada had some overly excited (and not particularly attractive) cheerleader do the same for her team. You sort of knew then we had a blow out in the making.

Another TV highlight: The interview with Joba Chamberlain's dad, complete with his Yankee hat. Bandwagon fan. My favorite moment was when the old man was asked, "What's it like for your son to be sharing a locker room with Rodriguez, Clemens, Mussina and Pettite?" If Derek Jeter was watching at home, I'm sure he pulled an Elvis and shot the TV to death with a glock. If Joba's dad wanted to have some fun, he would have said, "A-Rod won't talk to my boy because he's native American, he's never even seen Clemens, Mussina gets teased all the time, and Pettite? Well, you know what they say about guys with big noses? Big breathe air strips, because that guy aint everything downstairs if you know what I mean." Who knew old man Chamberlain was an usher at the Stadium? Great, now another thing for me to hate the Yankees even more: A bunch of Huskers jumping on the Bronx Bandwagon because Joba has become some cult hero.

Nobody rushes over to a sideline reporter before halftime like Billy C. I swear he looks at the clock when there's 2 minutes left to go and starts figuring out where the cameras are so he knows where to run. Callahan still can't get over what a big deal the Big Red Breakfast is.

Lucky had 233 yards on the ground today, which is always nice. But I was more impressed when I looked at the Omaha World Herald this morning and saw that last year, Lucky caught 323 balls for 345 yards. Not a great average, but catching 323 passes has to be some sort of record now, doesn't it? Fucking typos.

Today though, 96 snaps on offense, and 70 of them were running plays.

In a non-Husker related issue, ESPN is proclaiming today's Michigan loss as the biggest upset in college football history. As Vincent Vega would say, "That's a bold statement."

Somewhere, Owen Wilson is still in a hospital, probably unable to watch or even care about anything that happened in Lincoln from 2:30pm-6pm. It was a nice opener, maybe even something Owen could hang his hat on. We'll learn a lot more next week. Probably not about Owen Wilson, but about the Corn.